Wednesday, 23 March 2011

What's Cancer got to do with it?

I just spent the weekend in the midst of 80 or so soul seeking women (and a few men) at the Seane Corn workshop at Semperviva in Vancouver. The topic revolved around what Vinyasa Yoga is all about, the types of people most attracted to it (ie me and all fiery type A's), how best to teach it and what it tends to reveal. What I loved about the weekend is that Seane seemed to recognize that the topic didn't have far to go with us. She seemed to see that we were all searching for some deeper truths about ourselves beyond the fact that we're sweat mongers. The workshop evolved into work around our energy centres or Chakras as we moved deeper into postures that challenged our deepest layers of tension. Now we're talking my body said. Let's get into the nitty gritty. While in these deep and juicy postures she challenged us to ask ourselves big questions. What are our patterns, what are our blocks, in what way do we limit ourselves, how do we hold on to what we believe to be true? All I could think about was my brother's battle with Cancer.

So what does Cancer have to do with it? I know that since I was told that I have an 80% chance of developing the disease I have been scared, stressed and sad. I went to the mat and worked it out. What does a percentage really mean? What is Cancer anyway? All I can begin to understand in me is what is happening now, today and appreciate that I will never know the whole truth about anything. Down dogging, chattarungaing, lunging, creating heat in my muscles and freedom in my joints, that's the truth.

And while I watch my brother (who by the way is my absolute hero, idol, love and light) struggle, fight, laugh, cry his way through this affliction I can only stand by and support him on his path. It would never serve him for me to take it on or make it about me. Yes, I can question what is it about Cancer in my world, with my mother having it twice, my sweet dog dying of it and my super hero brother getting it at such a young age. I don't get it. I guess that's the point. That's what I have to breathe into. Suddenly I understand that my true path is in releasing the tension around "trying to understand", or trying to find meaning in everything. The effort around being victimized, being fearful, being paranoid only lands me deeper into a rigid life. I'm up to bigger things than that.

While asking some bigger questions about what areas in our lives are blocked or dull it's so important to remember to keep living BIG. To appreciate that every obstacle in our path diverts us onto something bigger and better. Live big, love bigger and light up the path ahead. I do this in honour of my amazing mother who revolutionized her life and mine because of Cancer. I do this in honour of my brother who can find humour in the darkest moments.

I can say in all honesty without any kind of self promotion, the Yoga Jam has been the purest venue for open hearted grace. A place of healing, celebration and joy surrounded by our community. Yoga relieves the tension on a broad scale. This is what the world needs. This is what we need to fight Cancer.

1 comments:

Yogi Fari said...

i might be in love with your brother and the rest of the family :)
may you keep finding love and joy.

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My name is Erin Anderson, I'm in love with yoga. I found out how to love deeper, live lighter and reach further through yoga. I'm passionate about sharing just that. In order to do that, I created The Yoga Jam Events as a means to elevate spirit, cultivate community and generate abundance. Coming together in play, breath and movement we can make real impact in the world, starting in Kenya with a possibility that knows no bounds. Each Yoga Jam Event donates proceeds to the Africa Yoga Project www.africayogaproject.org. This blog is dedicated to what I've learned along the way.
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